Tom Lucy is the kind of guy one finds impossible to dislike. He’s kind, charming, FUNNY, engaging, and has two first names. He has a solid group of friends, a loving family, and has a good head on his shoulders. He’s career-oriented. A thinker. Driven. He’s 23.
The first time we met, we began our conversation by examining our mutual, ten year separated, existential crises. Our second encounter was at a birthday dinner where I watched him concoct a last-minute birthday speech, which was perfectly (and comedically) executed. The third time we sat across one another and I badgered the poor guy for an hour on comedy and the inner-workings of his field, which led us to discuss the potential of sitting down to record the very podcast you’re about to hear. He said yes. I followed up…and, here we are.
We spoke of all the things I like best: Vulnerability, Work Ethic, Family Dynamics, Relationship’s pitfalls and joys, and Wake Up calls. For 23, the dude has a lot to share without an ounce of judgement or righteousness. I’ll let you decide for yourself. Oh, and don’t bother calling him Tom. It’s Tom Lucy.
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Tom Lucy is the kind of guy one finds impossible to dislike. He’s kind, charming, FUNNY, engaging, and has two first names. He has a solid group of friends, a loving family, and has a good head on his shoulders. He’s career-oriented. A thinker. Driven. He’s 23.
The first time we met, we began our conversation by examining our mutual, ten year separated, existential crises. Our second encounter was at a birthday dinner where I watched him concoct a last-minute birthday speech, which was perfectly (and comedically) executed. The third time we sat across one another and I badgered the poor guy for an hour on comedy and the inner-workings of his field, which led us to discuss the potential of sitting down to record the very podcast you’re about to hear. He said yes. I followed up…and, here we are.
We spoke of all the things I like best: Vulnerability, Work Ethic, Family Dynamics, Relationship’s pitfalls and joys, and Wake Up calls. For 23, the dude has a lot to share without an ounce of judgement or righteousness. I’ll let you decide for yourself. Oh, and don’t bother calling him Tom. It’s Tom Lucy.
20. DECLAN MICHAEL LAIRD | Actor + Mental Health Advocate
IN THE UNKNOWN with Alyonka
55 minutes 10 seconds
7 years ago
20. DECLAN MICHAEL LAIRD | Actor + Mental Health Advocate
Declan's an interesting character. In that, he's an actor, so by default he's a character. He can switch in and out of accents. He plays different roles. Different careers. Different, well, characters.
“Growing up I always loved movies - loved movies. I saw them as an escape, probably because when I went to the cinema and I was watching a movie, your mind shuts off for two hours and you’re not thinking about anything else and I used to see it as an escape. I used to watch the movies and think, I could do that! I could act like that. I could be that character.”
When I first met him, I assumed him to be a budding producer. After all, he came into the VICE offices to pitch something to our team. In my haste to be prepared for the meeting, I googled the guy. Actor. Football player. Scottish. Producer? I don't get it. Which one am I dealing with right now. That was me, then. Fearful of The Unknown. Wanting to set myself up for success. Playing my cards right.
Last summer, as I was freshly embarking on my Recovery, Declan's instagram profile popped up. Mental Health Advocate. Hmph, I thought. Was that always written there? Or had I not paid much attention to it. Selective Learning. We miss a lot when we're trying to predict the situation and its' outcome.
I reached out. We talked on the phone. He told me his story, similar to the one you'll hear on this podcast. Raw, Transparent, Honest, Vulnerable. All the things I was striving towards. It's funny, right? How much choice we have in what we see? It was there all along, that Declan character, but I didn't want to see it. Perhaps, couldn't. But I could see him now. Clearly.
We set a date and in the summer of 2017 we recorded this pod. I edited it a few weeks back, the content even more relevant than before. Now, with 25 Workshops in my belt, I have spent enough time with Men to fully understand the gems Declan was throwing my way.
Like this
"The conversation needs to be opened up to things like mental health. To things like addiction. Because nowadays, especially with social media, the rates of depression, bi-polar disorder, of any of these inner turmoil conditions that people are facing are going up dramatically."
And this
“Things like social media - no one puts the truth to what’s going on. It’s a highlight reel of their life, of their very best moments of every day, or every week, or every month. People then start to compare their insides to other people’s outsides and I think that’s a very dangerous place to be.”
And this
“My friend might call me and say, ‘hey how are you doing’ and you tell the truth, you go, ‘you know what man I’m actually having a really shitty day’ and that person on the phone goes ‘fuck so am I’, and you talk about it together on a real level. Then suddenly you get on a level where you’re a lot more comfortable talking about it with everyone.”
There's plenty more. His life trajectory is quite fascinating, filled with characters, roles, changes, ups + downs, and most importantly, failures.
“Not being excellent in everything that you do is okay. Nobody’s excellent at everything. Nobody’s great at everything. And constant failure is the key to success.”
I'll let him take it from here.
IN THE UNKNOWN with Alyonka
Tom Lucy is the kind of guy one finds impossible to dislike. He’s kind, charming, FUNNY, engaging, and has two first names. He has a solid group of friends, a loving family, and has a good head on his shoulders. He’s career-oriented. A thinker. Driven. He’s 23.
The first time we met, we began our conversation by examining our mutual, ten year separated, existential crises. Our second encounter was at a birthday dinner where I watched him concoct a last-minute birthday speech, which was perfectly (and comedically) executed. The third time we sat across one another and I badgered the poor guy for an hour on comedy and the inner-workings of his field, which led us to discuss the potential of sitting down to record the very podcast you’re about to hear. He said yes. I followed up…and, here we are.
We spoke of all the things I like best: Vulnerability, Work Ethic, Family Dynamics, Relationship’s pitfalls and joys, and Wake Up calls. For 23, the dude has a lot to share without an ounce of judgement or righteousness. I’ll let you decide for yourself. Oh, and don’t bother calling him Tom. It’s Tom Lucy.