A lot of us feel the pressure to perform well in bed — whether that means lasting long or wanting sex "enough".
In this episode, I talk to researcher Noémie Viens about how perfectionism can mess with your sex life. We explore why being hard on yourself (or feeling pressure from others) can lead to performance anxiety, shame, and disconnection — and how letting go of “perfect sex” can actually make it better.
You’ll learn:
→ The three types of perfectionism — and which one is most linked to sexual distress
→ Why some perfectionists report higher desire, and what’s really going on there
→ How performance pressure shows up differently for men and women
→ What to do if you or your partner tend to be self-critical or chase validation in bed
→ How to shift from pressure and performance to connection and pleasure
The study covered in the episode is: Multidimensional Perfectionism and Sexual Difficulties Among Adult Couples: A Dyadic Cross-Sectional and Longitudinal Study written by Viens et al.
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