56: I think that I am fully healed from mental illness and trauma until it all hits me all over again and I go right back into old thought patterns. It's the whole process of healing though; recovery isn't meant to be pretty and easy, you have to face the same situations over and over again until you learn how to handle it better. You have to face the uncomfortableness, go through the messiness and sometimes fall back. But you are ALWAYS moving forward and growing no matter how it seems.