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I Love You I Kill You
I Love You I Kill You
26 episodes
1 day ago
If you crossbreed a Murder podcast with a Relationship Podcast you get 'I Love You I Kill You'. A loving couple joke about all the funny ways we'd murder each other! We are joking about wanting to kill each other. But, when you are with someone a long time there is always something that annoys you enough to want to kill your significant other. Like when your boyfriend is obsessed with making ice, don't you want to freeze him in a bath filled with ice cubes? Or when your girlfriend is obsessed with buying house plants. Oh wow, don't you wish you can put her in giant pot surrounded by Venus Flytraps? So, really it is like any other podcast where the people who are dating are the hosts. A true boyfriend girlfriend comedy podcast. A funny show about death. There's a lot of the comedy podcast about murder stuff out there, but when have you seen a comedy show where the hosts want to kill each other? So if you are wondering "How would you kill your boyfriend" this show might be for you.
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True Crime
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If you crossbreed a Murder podcast with a Relationship Podcast you get 'I Love You I Kill You'. A loving couple joke about all the funny ways we'd murder each other! We are joking about wanting to kill each other. But, when you are with someone a long time there is always something that annoys you enough to want to kill your significant other. Like when your boyfriend is obsessed with making ice, don't you want to freeze him in a bath filled with ice cubes? Or when your girlfriend is obsessed with buying house plants. Oh wow, don't you wish you can put her in giant pot surrounded by Venus Flytraps? So, really it is like any other podcast where the people who are dating are the hosts. A true boyfriend girlfriend comedy podcast. A funny show about death. There's a lot of the comedy podcast about murder stuff out there, but when have you seen a comedy show where the hosts want to kill each other? So if you are wondering "How would you kill your boyfriend" this show might be for you.
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True Crime
Episodes (20/26)
I Love You I Kill You
Give Up the Need to ALWAYS Be Right

We got Danny Z on the pod. This guy is an up and comer on the scene. If you are listening you might be asking, who is this Italian man I am listening to. Well, guess what, he may sound like some Italian guido fella, but he is as Arabic as they come. PLOT TWIST. Enjoy the episode!

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4 months ago
57 minutes 43 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Grown Men Don't Care about Birthdays

Amer hangs out with old reliable Joel Slavik. They talk some good stuff. Two good old boys talking about the world's troubles and a bit of their own. Enjoy!

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4 months ago
1 hour 17 minutes 46 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Dentist HORROR STORIES!

This episode is all about the grossest and worst dentist stories. You forget the poor dentist has to look INTO our mouths when they work. Not all of us have pretty little holes in our heads. Some of us neglect our teeth until they are rotting piles of garbage. This whole ep is dedicated to the animals of the world that won't brush their teeth. Stories like foreign objects growing in someone's mouth, gluing fake nails to your teeth, and attaching a seagull's beak as a replacement tooth are all stories in this episode!

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1 year ago
31 minutes 34 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Tragedy at a Music Festival

HELLO ROCKERS! We talked about Gabriel's outing to a Queen's of the Stoneage concert so we made this episode all about death at a concert! Gabriel tells a story about the death of Meredith Curly Hunter Jr. at the Altamont Speedway Festival where he was murdered during the Rolling Stones show. It is a tragic but incredibly captivating story that has been brought up in popular culture for decades! We also discuss different dance moves you can perform at a concert. ENJOY!


Tell your friends! Send us an email to iloveyouikillyoupodcast@gmail.com



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1 year ago
33 minutes 59 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
What would it take to K*LL a Co-Worker?

This is all about murder in the work place. You know how you have annoying coworkers that keep on stealing the yogurt you were saying for lunch? BANG! What a way to get fired am I right? This is a great episode to listen to while at work. Great stories all dealing with murder at the work place! RATE US 5 stars on all your apps!

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1 year ago
41 minutes 37 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Choking on Eggs over Easter Weekend

Welcome and Happy Easter everyone! This is a great episode, you're so lucky to hear it for the first time, ever! We talk about crimes commited over Easter weekend. One of which is the 'Easter Sunday Mass*cre'. A story about a son overshadowed by his brother who takes matters into his own hands and gets revenge. And a slightly light-hearted story: 'The Hatton Garden Robberies'. A bunch of old retired fellas decide to rob a bank and finally live life like they're in their 30s again! It is a hot episode so tell your friends! Send us an email at iloveyouikillyoupodcast@gmail.com and we'll read your crime stories on the podcast!

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1 year ago
35 minutes 58 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Is Voyeurism such a HORRIBLE crime?

We talk all things voyeur in this episode. Gabriel got himself a pair of binoculars and he can't stop spying on the neighbors. If he continues on this path he might end up seeing something he wish he hadn't! We talk about 3 different cases that have to do with either witnessing a crime, peeping toms and the Bystander Effect. Very interesting stuff in this episode. We cap it off with how we would off each other with a pair of binoculars. You wouldn't want to miss this episode!

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1 year ago
31 minutes

I Love You I Kill You
Getting Sloppy on the Slopes of Aspen

We talk about a murder on the ski slopes on this episode of I Love You I Kill You. We love skiing so we think about creative ways we would kill each other while shooting down the mountain at top speed. We also discuss 3 devious stories that all take place near or on the slopes! It's a great ep and you should tell everyone you know about this fine podcast!

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1 year ago
30 minutes 54 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Bored to Death watching Dune 2

One of us wants to get into Dune and the other would rather die than get into Dune. Isn't an audiobook of the classic Sci-fi novel where every character has their own voice-over artist sound interesting? It does to one nerd and the other person not so much. This episode is all about boring someone to death. We also go over stories where three people were led to their demise through boredom of some kind. Check out this cute podcast! Thank you!

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1 year ago
24 minutes 37 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
The Engagement ring dipped in Poison (First episode back!)
We are back after a 2 and a half year break! This episode is all about murderous spouses and couples. There killer old grannies, vanishing brides and the engagement ring I bought for my fiancé dipped in poison. You do not want to miss this episode! Rate us 5 stars and tell your friends. Okay bye!
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1 year ago
32 minutes 22 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
My Valentine Murder - ILYIKY 16
Happy Valentine's Day! In this ep we talk about what we would do on our perfect Valentine's Day and how it would end in MURDER! Thanks for listening. If you want to watch video versions of ILYIKY I started uploading them on http://youtube.com/c/gabrielomassi Thank you!
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4 years ago
18 minutes 21 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
What's for dinner? - ILYIKY 15
Doesn't it get you angry when your partner can't make up their mind what they'd like for dinner. Does it make you so angry that you want to murder them? Well, come on in, grab a seat and enjoy this meal! Try not to choke on the bones! Tell your friends! To watch video versions of the podcast check out http://youtube.com/c/gabrielomassi We started uploading episodes there!
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4 years ago
23 minutes 21 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Shower Murder is Sexy - ILYIKY 14
SORRY! It's been a hot minute since the last episode. We know there are plenty of young boys and girls who wanna hear their favorite Aunt and Uncle murder each other while drinking a glass of chardonnay. This episode we talk about shower murder. We cover an actual murder that took place in the shower and movies that feature murders that were in showers. Please enjoy!!! Subscribe!Follow Gabriel Omassi on youtube! http://youtube.com/c/gabrielomassi
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4 years ago
21 minutes 32 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Hank Hill is going to get you! - ILYIKY 13
SEND us an email! We want to read them on the podcast! iloveyouikillyoupodcast@gmail.com Your favorite murder stories! King of the Hill is the topic of this episode! What is more spookier than Hank Hill coming to murder you? We talk a lot about how Claire is annoyed at how much I watch and quote King of the Hill and comes up with ways she'd kill me based on the series. Please enjoy! Also Subscribe to us on youtube!
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4 years ago
18 minutes 34 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Can't cook to save your LIFE - ILYIKY 12
Sorry, Sorry, Sorry! We were so busy we couldn't record any eps. We promise that will never happen again! Please enjoy this episode about how I stink at cooking so much it could murder a person!!! Follow us on youtube! And follow Gabriel Omassi on Youtube as well! Thank you!!!
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5 years ago
14 minutes 33 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
He loves his bird more than he loves me! - ILYIKY 11
We talk about how I am obsessed with my pet bird. He's a cute little guy and I have a great time with him. Claire is very jealous of this bird because she has to spend all her time alone in her room working. We talk about ways we can use this little parrot as device FOR MURDER!!! Hope you enjoy this episode. This True Crime podcast meets Relationship Advice. Never been done before! Send us an email! And follow us on Youtube! Bye bye!!
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5 years ago
17 minutes 11 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Your voice is a torture Device - ILYIKY#10
OMG WE MADE IT TO 10 EPISODES. We know this one is late. We promise to be on time from now on. This episode is about how Claire and I are trapped in the same apartment 24 hours a day due to our city-wide Covid lockdown. At a certain point of every day she yells I'm hungry!!! And it's been going on for weeks. I start to believe she is torturing me slolwy with her own voice. Like something you would experience in Guantanamo Bay. Thanks for listening. Look us up on youtube and send us emails!
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5 years ago
17 minutes 11 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
So fresh and so Clean -ILYIKY #9
One thing that really bugs Claire is how I never put my toothbrush away after using it. I'm not sure how one would murder with a toothbrush. Perhaps we should asked someone in Prison. They are toothbrush murder EXPERTS! You can fashion one into a knife and really have some fun. Wow! What a podcast, probably our best one yet. Maybe. Please follow us on Youtube! And subscribe to the podcast! Rate, Review, all that stuff! Tell your friends!!
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5 years ago
23 minutes 57 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Murder at IKEA! - ILYIKY #8
Everyone likes IKEA. Some people love IKEA. And some people are obsessed with IKEA... Claire is obsessed. Going to IKEA is her favorite outing. If it were up to her, every weekend would be spent going to IKEA and picking out a new set of decorative pillows. I think IKEA would be a great place for a horror movie. Where she is chased by evil IKEA murderers. It's a fun drunken episode! Subscribe to our youtube Channel and send us an Email! We want to read them on the podcast!!!
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5 years ago
24 minutes 38 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
Eating a Packet of Bacon a DAY - ILYIKY #7
So, while Claire was away in Jolly Old England. I had a lot of time all by myself. What I decided to do was to eat everything that was in the fridge and everything that was at the grocery store. The result is me gaining over 15 pounds in less than a month. Now I have decided to count my calories and lose the weight. Claire is annoyed by how disciplined I am and wishes to kill me. Please follow us on youtube! Click the link to our page! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCteDgnM0mYMQvHmfuHIhmmg
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5 years ago
27 minutes 23 seconds

I Love You I Kill You
If you crossbreed a Murder podcast with a Relationship Podcast you get 'I Love You I Kill You'. A loving couple joke about all the funny ways we'd murder each other! We are joking about wanting to kill each other. But, when you are with someone a long time there is always something that annoys you enough to want to kill your significant other. Like when your boyfriend is obsessed with making ice, don't you want to freeze him in a bath filled with ice cubes? Or when your girlfriend is obsessed with buying house plants. Oh wow, don't you wish you can put her in giant pot surrounded by Venus Flytraps? So, really it is like any other podcast where the people who are dating are the hosts. A true boyfriend girlfriend comedy podcast. A funny show about death. There's a lot of the comedy podcast about murder stuff out there, but when have you seen a comedy show where the hosts want to kill each other? So if you are wondering "How would you kill your boyfriend" this show might be for you.