Often when someone is going through a hard time they will talk about “working on” or “processing” their pain. Those sound like concrete phrases. If someone is “working on” a fence, we can safely assume hammer, nails, or paint is involved. If a store is “processing” a purchase, we can assume they are shipping the product and passing the finances through their accounting department. But in the relational or emotional realm phrases like “working on” and “processing” become highly ambiguous.

Similarly, in the church, we talk about “God’s will” as if it were a clear concept, but often we feel as confused as someone who lost a loved one and is trying to “do grief.” We think God’s will is something we should naturally know how to pursue. The fact that we use the phrase “God’s will” frequently only makes this misconception and the accompanying insecurity worse.

In this chapter we want to answer two questions that will help us know what we’re talking about when we talk about “trying to find God’s will” for a decision: (1) How many ways does the Bible define “God’s will”? and (2) How should we think about finding God’s will?

Answering these questions will set the stage for chapter three, where we will provide principles for personal decision making that are essential for the health of a marriage between two perpetual decision makers (i.e., people). 

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