And it's not always easy to identify, or to leave and make a change if you do identify it.

Humans have an unconscious need to belong, leaving what’s known takes courage and vulnerability. In more medieval times leaving the tribe would have placed you at risk of harm or death.

There’s also a level of lying to people that we don’t feel 100% compatible with.

Accepting things like behaviours you don’t like or agree with, telling them you’re ok with it while deep down you are not.

To make a change, you need to develop the courage to admit the truth to yourself and accept the parts of you you’ve been denying.

And this applies to all situations in life, it could be with a romantic partner, a friend, a workplace. A great question to ponder is ‘where have I been lying to myself’ and what do I want to happen instead?

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