Buckle your chainmail and grab a goblet of questionable red wine, because in this episode Amanda and Andrea are diving sword-first into the explosive Season 2 finale of Game of Thrones, aka the episode where everyone either dies, disappears, or makes a terrible life choice.

We unpack Tyrion’s fall from grace—literally and politically—as he wakes up with a new scar, no job, and the realization that being smart in Westeros just gets you stabbed in the face. Meanwhile, Joffrey is out here promoting incompetence and proposing to a new fiancé with all the warmth of a cold bowl of Frey soup.

Over in Dragonstone, Stannis has a full-blown existential crisis after his wildfire-fueled loss at Blackwater. We discuss his gradual evolution from "stern uncle" energy to "cult dad with shadow baby baggage." Melisandre’s influence remains strong, and we wonder if she’s just one bad prophecy away from selling crystal necklaces on Instagram.

Daenerys takes a trippy detour through the House of the Undying, where the budget goes full abstract art. We explore her surprisingly chill reaction to walking through a dreamscape of snowy Iron Thrones, dead Dothraki husbands, and unhelpful warlocks. But the real question is - Did you know Xaro used to sleep on the docks of Qarth?

We also catch up with Jon Snow and the wildlings, Bran’s magical mystery tour to nowhere, and Theon’s failed TED Talk on leadership that ends with him getting whacked by his own men.

Expect snarky commentary, unnecessary historical comparisons, and at least three rants about why Littlefinger is basically a medieval LinkedIn scammer. It's chaos, it's carnage, it's Season 2, baby—because in Westeros, the only thing you can count on is betrayal, dragons, and emotional damage.