I've worked on a dozen essays and episodes in which to add this clip, including in the unfinished episode about my other grandfather's death, who was also military and was also given full military honors. I've tried to find an eloquent way to talk about how hard it is to untangle my sliver of a cultural past from the all consuming monster of whiteness and nationalism. I've also wanted to dig deeper into why I went so hard into antifascism and why it is so personal to me, but honestly what I caught on tape right after finishing our first episode (in which I had made fun of bagpipes and immediately very quietly started to spiral) is a lot by itself. So maybe it is best to just post the raw audio. It's a very deep kind of pain when an ancestral part of who you are is used to justify genocide, especially when your own feelings about that part of you is complicated (as it often is with family). This is in solidarity with my anti-zionist Jewish friends right now. On a positive note, Jimmy Marr is dead now. You are not missed. Rest in Piss. #freepalestine Edit: Was told by a friend that I should add the context that Jimmy Marr was a well known holocaust denier and white nationalist who went by "Genocide Jimmy" and drove around a truck with antisemitic slogans written on it.

Remastered by A. Campbell Payne. Originally aired 9/3/17 CW: Suicide & police brutality Spoke with Aneka from the SoJust Collective about centering POC, the founding fathers, police brutality, educating allies, being tired, passing the mic, no plaforming/active platforming, confronting your racist family, the allyship industrial complex, rewarding white mediocrity, the Red Cross, Rechts Gegen Rechts, difficulties with fundraising, and seriously, ruin Christmas. You can donate to Aneka for their time by sending money to their venmo @pettymcbetty . If you counted more instances of bad allyship than I did, use your number, and if you counted fewer, use mine (14). Notes: - The controversy was in fact about Deady Hall at the University of Oregon, named after Judge Matthew Deady, co-author of the Oregon State Constitution and one of the most influential supporters of Oregon’s Exclusion Laws. A good guest viewpoint written on the subject here: uwire.com/2016/02/14/guest-vie…dy-hall-must-change/ -For the uninitiated, "FTP" stands for Fuck The Police - There was concern expressed for me, but I'm not in that relationship anymore and that story is very old. The point of it is not the individualization of the issue but the systemic stresses - Instead of donating to the Red Cross, you can go here to find how to get money directly to those who need it for Hurricane Harvey relief: www.colorlines.com/articles/how-do…s-color-houston Referenced: CAHOOTS mobile crisis intervention: whitebirdclinic.org/cahoots/ Rechts Gegen Rechts: www.youtube.com/watch?v=KvjIYl_Nlao Update 11/7/20: When this episode aired it was why I was rejected from Channel Zero Network. The reason given was because we should be talking about being "accomplices, not allies" and I was given a copy of the zine of the same name to read. However, we do talk about the Ally Industrial Complex in the episode and both Aneka and I disagreed with their response that this episode contributes to that mindset. However, you can read a copy of the zine here and decide for yourself: archive.org/details/Accomplices…lyIndustrialComplex

Wow! A. Campbell Payne is a listener and a professional audio engineer and offered to revamp some of the episodes, which is so awesome. This one in particular had major sound quality issues so here it is after they took a swing at it. Especially important to hear from trans people right now too. Thank you so much A.! Originally aired 7/9/17

Wow, this was a trip to find in the archives. Our first ever recording. A lot of it needs citations so listen critically, but there is a lot of good content (especially from CImms) that didn't make it into the first official episode so I'm glad to have found it. It's been a long four years and I don't feel the same way about everything any more, but this also sets up my next episode about Judas, militarism, and guilt very nicely. Feels good to step back and remember where this project came from and reflect on everything at the start of this harvest season. Transcript is partially done, got an auto transcript and it needs to be edited but it's a start: https://friendlyanarchism.medium.com/s1e0-how-it-started-3-23-17-transcript-f471b25f0988

Transcript: Hi all, so, life keeps happening and I've been having a hard time finding time to work on this show, but just so you know there is another episode in the works. This one is an essay like the first episode of this season and it's of a personal nature and I just want to make sure I get it right so I'm spending some extra time on it. Thank you to everyone who has been supporting me! Thank you to my patrons. And also just so you know, one of the listeners of the show started a discord so if that's something that you're interested in please join, it was really cool that they created that space. So that's a new thing and I've posted the link to it on the soundcloud. Alright, just checking in and I will see you again soon. Help me out at www.patreon.com/friendlyanarchism and join the Discord at discord.gg/5msYfvZkdx thank you!

Don't have spoons for full episodes right now, but just messing around with other forms of expression in the meantime! This is a round I did with myself while stuck in quarantine a while ago. Listened to it again today and was like, what the heck, might as well put it out there. It's a reimagining of an old song from my childhood to try to express what it feels like to disassociate. Enjoy! A fan made a new discord: discord.gg/mPs8Peah

Just for funsies. Based on "Come All Ye Coal Miners" by Sarah Ogan Gunning, a turn of the 20th century union organizer. Come all pandemic workers wherever you may be And listen to a story that I'll relate to thee My name is nothin' extree but the truth to you I'll tell I am a covid worker too, I'm sure l wish you well Right now it is the most dangerous work in our land today With plenty of dirty slavin' labor and very little pay Oh worker won't you wake up and open your eyes and see What the dirty capitalist system is doin' to you and me They’ll take our very lives, they take our children's lives Take fathers away from children and husbands away from wives Oh worker, won't you organize wherever you may be And make this a land of freedom for workers like you and me Dear worker, they will slave you 'til you can't work no more And what'll you get for your living but a dollar in a company store A broken-down room to live in, no heat or working locks You have to pay the landlord rent, your payin' never stops I am a pandemic worker, I'm sure l wish you well Let's sink this capitalist system in the darkest pits of hell

"Let’s do something that they can’t even imagine." Part 2 of my conversation with my friend Candice who is an economist, communist, mother, and all around rad lady. We spoke about everyday antifascism, being a disabled and limited radical activist, taking care of each other, and more. Transcript: https://friendlyanarchism.medium.com/s2e3-everyday-antifascism-celebrity-and-making-something-new-with-candice-part-2-transcript-ecfcf650f20a Notes: -I just want to note that the inclusion of liberals, while a part of a popular front strategy, is playing with fire. I much prefer radicalizing/working with people who are apolitical -I should have mentioned fascist creep in the form of "gender critical" dialogue. Transphobia is a major source of reactionary rightwing garbage right now -I was a little hard on Portland, it's a big place with a big scene and so obviously not everyone involved has all the ego about it. A couple really good antifascist/activist resources coming out of that area are the podcasts "It Did Happen Here" and "Rural Roots Rising" -Many Q-anoners are in fact very dangerous, I had in mind one particular memory -Greasy hair does not actually protect you from Covid-19. Music by Kylo Ren www.kyloren.bandcamp.com/ Support my work here! ko-fi.com/friendlyanarchism or www.patreon.com/friendlyanarchism Referenced: Global birth rate: https://ourworldindata.org/grapher/crude-birth-rate?stackMode=absolute®ion=World List of further info on fascist creep: Population and ecofascism -https://wearyourvoicemag.com/humans-are-not-the-virus-eco-fascist/ -https://www.teenvogue.com/story/what-is-ecofascism-explainer Antisemitism -https://caityjohnstone.medium.com/on-antisemitism-critical-thinking-and-conspiracy-theories-db37e7b24fee -https://www.haaretz.com/us-news/.premium-how-the-gop-is-energizing-and-entrenching-antisemitism-in-america-1.9560897 Organic Food/Farming -https://theconversation.com/the-roots-of-organic-farming-lie-in-fascism-81448 -https://gen.medium.com/nazi-hippies-when-the-new-age-and-far-right-overlap-d1a6ddcd7be4 -http://daanis.ca/2020/09/28/the-racist-history-of-ag-about-big-ag-with-dr-sarah-taber/ Class reductionism -https://abeautifulresistance.org/site/2020/11/7/class-reductionism-and-white-identity-politics-in-a-post-trump-era -https://time.com/5864705/climate-change-black-lives-matter/

Candice is an economist, housing services specialist, communist, and mom who is brilliant. We spoke about Covid-19, how at-risk people are pushed to the front lines, shitty bosses, the injustice system, the roots of fascism, how important it is to listen to marginalized people, and much more. Transcript: https://friendlyanarchism.medium.com/transcript-s2e2-pandemic-karens-and-systemic-fascism-with-candice-part-1-beac0c841177 Notes: -Candice is in a league of her own and her experience is not legal advice. - According to the wikipedia timeline of the Covid-19 outbreak: "A September 2020 review noted "The possibility that the COVID-19 infection had already spread to Europe at the end of last year is now indicated by abundant, even if partially circumstantial, evidence", including pneumonia case numbers and radiology in France and Italy in November and December" -RIP David Graeber :( Music by Kylo Ren https://kyloren.bandcamp.com/ Support my work here! https://ko-fi.com/friendlyanarchism or https://www.patreon.com/friendlyanarchism Referenced: https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/david-graeber-to-save-the-world-we-re-going-to-have-to-stop-working https://universe.byu.edu/2021/01/22/native-and-indigenous-people-are-disproportionately-affected-by-covid-19/ https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2019/01/190123112330.htm https://eji.org/issues/presumption-of-guilt/ https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/09/innocence-is-irrelevant/534171/ https://www.theguardian.com/world/2009/jul/22/henry-louis-gates-arrested-at-home https://www.chicagotribune.com/opinion/commentary/ct-eric-garner-laws-felons-chokehold-perspec-1125-20141204-story.html

Happy new year! Essay here: https://friendlyanarchism.medium.com/i-want-peace-on-earth-so-i-left-the-quakers-and-became-antifa-889d35aa6f7c For more on Quakers and slavery: https://www.friendsjournal.org/slavery-in-the-quaker-world/ For an insurrectionary take on Quakers (including a really good indigenous history of William Penn): https://contagionpress.com/books/movement-for-no-society/

I'm back! I never released this episode during the first season because I wasn't ready to talk about all of this. However, my personal backstory with "mental illness" and finding god is an important precursor to the second season, where we're going to delve more into neurodivergence, disability, and ableism. Transcript: https://medium.com/@friendlyanarchism/s1e31-5-the-spiritual-radical-left-burnout-and-disability-with-the-young-quaker-pod-transcript-18fa785d2b5e Show notes: I spoke with Jessica Hubbard-Bailey about being religious in a lefty household, the radical spiritual revival, pain caused by Christianity, the creation of white slaveholder evangelism, finding spirituality and Quakerism, carving out space for spiritual leftists, the benefits of having a person of faith in your affinity group, inner peace as a service to community, burn-out culture, the danger of spreading anxiety and fear, gender-coding of work, our personal stories of disability, productivity as worth, lithium, Jesus' love of the sick, John the Baptist, letting people exist instead of trying to fix you, being held in the light, wheelchairs are freedom, and the social model of disability. 7:05: It gets mentioned a few times throughout the show, so I want to clarify that the idea that the right has "co-opted" Jesus is often used as a cop-out and an excuse folks use to evade holding christianity accountable for all the damage it has done. 9:26: Article removed from Forbes on the destruction of amerikan liberation christianity: https://www.politicalorphans.com/the-article-removed-from-forbes-why-white-evangelicalism-is-so-cruel/ 16:05: I speak lovingly about the Quaker meeting houses in Philadelphia (which are beautiful) but I have since found out were in part built using money from the slavery trade. I had not learned yet at the time this was recorded about the messy and disturbing relationship between Quakerism, slavery, and whiteness. More on that subject: https://www.friendsjournal.org/slavery-in-the-quaker-world/ 26:00: Ironic erasure of the existing spiritual radical left communities by assuming whiteness of the "radical left", my apologies! 30:16: Affinity groups can be formed for any reason, not just by type of work. These days I prefer groups of 4-6. More info on affinity group organizing: https://www.sproutdistro.com/catalog/zines/organizing/affinity-groups-essential 35:58: Did I use they/them pronouns for god? Why yes I did *foreshadowing* 38:15: I use the word "healthy" a few times throughout the show, which can have ableist undertones. More on ableist language: https://www.disabilityandrepresentation.com/2013/09/14/ableist-language/ 39:12: Mutual Aid Disaster Relief has an incredible list of resources about mental/emotional/trauma/wellness care: https://mutualaiddisasterrelief.org/health-wellness/ 39:28: I heavily blamed myself for my burn-out but more was going on.. 51:48 : The term "differently abled" is widely understood as ableist, please forgive me as I was struggling to understand and express my own experience 55:23: Some feel that the phrase "hold you in the light" upholds the racist linguistic dichotomy of light/dark and prefer other variations such as "hold you in god's chocolate" 57:20: I learned about Juniper the Holy Fool from Mark Van Steenwyk's Deep Roots Podcast: https://www.markvans.info/deep-roots-podcast-at-play-with-the-holy-fools/ 57:15: *foreshadowing* - Also I meant to say "uncarved" block 59:30: I was 30 years old before hearing about the social model of disability vs. the medical model. Quick intro: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MdzbyJq58Ws

anarchy ...(4)...... jesus Originally aired 7/15/17. Greg Williams is a Christian anarchist organizer and author I was very pleased to be able to speak with! We spoke about above ground community antifascist mass mobilization, how hate speech shuts down free speech, cops, solidarity, loving your neighbor, and more :) Referenced: "Free Speech and Love of Enemies: Anti-Fascism Theologically Understood" by Greg Williams http://www.jesusradicals.com/blog/free-speech-and-love-of-enemies-anti-fascism-theologically-understood So, I actually confused two articles. This one from Crimethinc: https://crimethinc.com/2017/07/10/dear-citizens-this-is-your-police-in-praise-of-the-police-free-zone-in-hamburg and this one from It's Going Down: https://itsgoingdown.org/made-large-scale-resistance-possible-g20-hamburg/?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=twitter Referenced: "Fragments of an Anarchist Anthropology" by David Graeber For more information about the rally in Portland on August 4th you can go here: https://www.facebook.com/events/239298920131113/

anarchy .....(6).... jesus Last week I spoke at the North American Anarchist Studies Network conference in so-called Montreal on the topic "We're Brokenhearted: Understanding Fierce Love in Anarchist Organizing" using lessons from historical anarchic christian mystic movements. There was a great discussion afterwards included in the audio. Notes here, still working on a full transcript: https://friendlyanarchism.medium.com/notes-were-brokenhearted-understanding-fierce-love-in-anarchist-organizing-at-naasn-montreal-65fdd9fed692 Thank you to NAASN for having me! You can support them and the work they do here: https://www.youcaring.com/naasn2018-1179259?utm_campaign=buttonshare&utm_medium=url&utm_source=copy&utm_content=cf_cp_01%20ucaring

anarchy .(2)........ jesus Spoke with chemical engineer Sophia Weber about seizing the means of production, anarchist scientists, worker’s cooperatives, the importance of process work, anarcho-syndicalism, stoicism, economies of scale, not-sexy anarchism, creating mutual aid networks, environmental racism and classism, failures of electoral politics, how anarchists deal with large public problems, collective bargaining, larger perspective interests, wildcat strikes, cats, witchery, the Kardashians, being in the struggle, bringing heaven to earth, connecting yourself with the Godhead, solitary witchcraft, covens, the balance between individualism and collectivism, and the Waterbury Mutual Aid and Defense Network. Referenced: International Journal of Engineering, Social Justice, and Peace http://esjp.org/journal "Fragments of an Anarchist Anthropology" by David Graeber Support the project on Patreon at www.patreon.com/friendlyanarchism

anarchy ......(7)... jesus Spoke with Matti, a co-conspirator in the Friendly Fire Collective about sacred geometry, what it means to be a “seeking” faith, fascist mysticism, touching the divine, witches, women saints, May Day, charismatic practices, Theater of the Oppressed & dada, atheist hostility, internal labor and liberation, self-discipline, process work, patriarchy, bad communication, using a green lens, Micah 6:8, and community as the antithesis to capitalism. Notes: *The example of a street medic trainer was hypothetical and not in reference to any real person *Joan of Arc was in fact burned at the stake, she was 19 years old Referenced: The Friendly Fire Collective go fund me: https://www.gofundme.com/friendly-fire-retreat More on Jordan Peterson: Jordan Peterson and Fascist Mysticism http://www.nybooks.com/daily/2018/03/19/jordan-peterson-and-fascist-mysticism/ More on Julius Evola: Rose City Antifa - The Wolves of Vinland: a Fascist Countercultural “Tribe” in the Pacific Northwest https://rosecityantifa.org/articles/the-wolves-of-vinland-a-fascist-countercultural-tribe-in-the-pacific-northwest/ Pew Research Center: Nearly half of the public (49%) says they have had a religious or mystical experience, defined as a “moment of sudden religious insight or awakening.” http://www.pewforum.org/2009/12/09/many-americans-mix-multiple-faiths/ More on Augusto Boal and Theater of the Oppressed: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Augusto_Boal On Karl Marx and atheism: What would Marx think about reactionary new atheists? By Ben Norton https://bennorton.com/what-would-marx-think-about-reactionary-new-atheists/ The Young Quaker Podcast http://youngquakerpodcast.libsyn.com/website He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. -Micah 6:8

Me and Hye Sung Francis from the Friendly Fire Collective were interviewed by Dean and Matt from another radical Christian podcast called The Magnificast about our organizing praxis, our upcoming May Day retreat in Philadelphia, and more! The deadline to apply for the retreat has been extended to March 29th, so if you are interested there is still time to apply :) https://friendlyfirecollective.wordpress.com/retreat/ An update on our f/Friends who were arrested in Lansing: https://friendlyfirecollective.wordpress.com/2018/03/23/an-update-on-the-arrested-f-friends/

anarchy ....(5)..... jesus Spoke with my friend of circumstance Issac about the Lansing protest, small(big) acts of solidarity, gratitude, athletic musicianship, simplicity, implicit power, affinity groups, instilled hierarchies, being a touring musician, the tyranny of structurelessness, DIY music, balancing idealism and experience, dislodging power, leadership, rules vs. no rules, voluntary association, taking credit for work, intellectual property and creative commons, church+capital+culture, the Western Wall, churches as a socialist enterprise, Friendly Fire, acting from faith and fact, anarchism as a way of life, thanking flowers, ableism, sneetches, light/dark, concurrent contradictory realities, cognitive dissonance, cognitive euphony, and fun with new equipment. Referenced: The bail fund for comrades arrested in Lansing protesting Richard Spencer's appearance: https://www.fundedjustice.com/stopspencermsu?ref=ab_f7ARsc_ab_9LOJM7tjsmX9LOJM7tjsmX The Tyranny of Structurelessness http://www.struggle.ws/pdfs/tyranny.pdf My patreon, thank you so so much to my patrons!!: www.patreon.com/friendlyanarchism My radical Quaker collective Friendly Fire: https://friendlyfirecollective.wordpress.com/ Richard Rohr, Franciscan Catholic mystic: https://cac.org/turning-toward-the-good-2016-02-18/ Notes: F. Scott Fitzgerald quote: "...the test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless and yet be determined to make them otherwise. This philosophy fitted on to my early adult life, when I saw the improbable, the implausible, often the "impossible," come true."

anarchy (1)......... jesus CW: Graphic violence, police brutality, mention of sexual harassment ------- Note from Nov. 2020: It's hard to listen to how traumatized I am, but amazing to hear in real time the effects of experiencing police brutality first hand for the first time. I had had a number of bad experiences with cops in the past and had seen brutality at protests prior to this, but as (weirdly casually) mentioned, that day cops had tried to run over my friends, had assaulted clergy, and had clearly wanted to kill me in a way I had not personally experienced up to that point. Even for someone who was dedicated to nonviolence with ample mental and martial arts training, it was a lot to deal with. After much thought I left in moments of rage because people should hear what happens when cops act the way they do. ------- I spoke to Molly from Charlottesville DSA about the protest last weekend in Knoxville against Matthew Heimbach and the Tradworkers appearance on campus. We got into how much cops suck and why you should yell at them, what exactly it is that antifa do, keeping tabs on fascists (with shout outs to Chris Cantwell "The Crying Nazi", Jason Kessler, and others) diversity of tactics, and a lot more! Notes: -It's Traditionalist Worker Party, I obviously knew that, don't look at me. -There are a lot of different approaches to antifascism and I am not speaking for all antifascists, just from my own experience and how I understand the work. -A big shout out to my new patrons! Thank you so much for your support. You can donate to keep this show running at www.patreon.com/friendlyanarchism :) -I'm now part of the Critical Mediations podcast network! They have a great line up of leftist podcasts including RevLeftRadio, my friends at the Magnificast, Season Of The Bitch, and more! You can check them out at www.critmediations.com References: A full report back: https://enoughisenough14.org/2018/02/23/knoxville-report-back-counter-protests-against-fascist-traditionalist-workers-party/ Anti-Kettling http://anarchish.blogspot.com/2011/01/how-to-win-at-kettling-guide-for-non.html

The House by the Side of the Road by Sam Walter Foss (1858-1911) There are hermit souls that live withdrawn In the peace of their self-content; There are souls, like stars, that dwell apart, In a fellowless firmament; There are pioneer souls that blaze their paths Where highways never ran;- But let me live by the side of the road And be a friend to man. Let me live in a house by the side of the road, Where the race of men go by- The men who are good and the men who are bad, As good and as bad as I. I would not sit in the scorner’s seat, Or hurl the cynic’s ban;- Let me live in a house by the side of the road And be a friend to man. I see from my house by the side of the road, By the side of the highway of life, The men who press with the ardor of hope, The men who are faint with the strife. But I turn not away from their smiles nor their tears- Both parts of an infinite plan;- Let me live in my house by the side of the road And be a friend to man. I know there are brook-gladdened meadows ahead And mountains of wearisome height; That the road passes on through the long afternoon And stretches away to the night. But still I rejoice when the travelers rejoice, And weep with the strangers that moan, Nor live in my house by the side of the road Like a man who dwells alone. Let me live in my house by the side of the road Where the race of men go by- They are good, they are bad, they are weak, they are strong, Wise, foolish- so am I. Then why should I sit in the scorner’s seat Or hurl the cynic’s ban?- Let me live in my house by the side of the road And be a friend to man.

anarchy (1)......... jesus Spoke with a Bavarian comrade about why we shouldn’t have to fight for normal things, denying abortion to rape victims, changes in the movement, ways to engage with the public, it’s not just about punching nazis, neighborhood organizing and liberated districts, how antifascism can’t get isolated, supporting local community, openness about being an antifascist, what you should and should not talk about in public, bringing our ideas to people, fascism isn’t just in the past, paranoia & anti-repression work, sharing praxis, you don’t fight for yourself alone, struggle in the street can’t exist without the struggle in the background, protest tactics, black bloc strategy, having fun working under such stressful conditions, humor, enjoying the small successes, fighting fear, being creative, GNWP adaptations, Americans fucked up punk, in a perfect world we wouldn’t need antifascism, antifa are the REAL fascists, all fascism is violent while antifascism is very diverse, liberals, fascism is capitalism in crisis, mutual aid as antifascism, and unlearning hate. *Notes: -Anarchists are doing a great job distributing literature to the public, happens a lot. Don't really know where that came from. -I say "antifa" really weird at one point. Yeah... I don't know. Didn't say it as weird as Mark Bray tho, so -Patriarchy is a problem in every type of household, singling out Muslim households is islamophobic