It’s tournament time, baby! The guys kick off The Best Excuses to Leave a Party Early Tournament (Part 1) — where 32 of the funniest, grossest, and most creative excuses go head-to-head to see which one reigns supreme. This  episode is for everyone who’s ever faked an emergency to escape small talk. (We are looking at YOU!) Plus, in this week’s listener emails, one guy’s girlfriend has gone full Christmas in October, another can’t deal with his partner’s overpacking, and the news gets wild with an NBA gambling scandal involving mob ties and insider bets. Then, in Not the Drag Queens, a so-called “family values” guy in Indiana gets busted for the exact crimes he’s been preaching against — proving once again, it’s never the drag queens.