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Everyone's A Critic
Jess & Jonathan
262 episodes
9 months ago
The internet's first curated volume of other people's opinions! Each week, Jess and Jonathan take a deep, dark dive into the web's most popular review platforms, sharing with you the funniest snippets of humanity they can find. Yelpers who can't find the bathroom. AllRecipes chefs who completely change the recipe, then review it anyway. Amazon shoppers and their thoughts on meat by-products. With new themes to explore each episode, Jess and Jonathan hope to give voice to all the desperate internet reviewers shouting endlessly into the void. It's a comedy podcast!
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Improv
Comedy
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All content for Everyone's A Critic is the property of Jess & Jonathan and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
The internet's first curated volume of other people's opinions! Each week, Jess and Jonathan take a deep, dark dive into the web's most popular review platforms, sharing with you the funniest snippets of humanity they can find. Yelpers who can't find the bathroom. AllRecipes chefs who completely change the recipe, then review it anyway. Amazon shoppers and their thoughts on meat by-products. With new themes to explore each episode, Jess and Jonathan hope to give voice to all the desperate internet reviewers shouting endlessly into the void. It's a comedy podcast!
Show more...
Improv
Comedy
Episodes (20/262)
Everyone's A Critic
ep 260 An Announcement
Thank you so much for every listen throughout the years. Change isn't easy. We love all of you and have loved every moment of making this silly, wonderful, obnoxious show. Every time you read a funny review in the wild, hear an out of context kazoo, or find yourself laughing at the inevitable heat death of the universe, let it remind you of us.   Take care of each other, make each other laugh. J and J
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2 years ago
7 minutes 9 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 259: Thank You for Yawning
In today's episode, a cohost yawns at her cohost, a boy kicks a cow too hard, and Barbie goes mutton busting. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Hello world!  
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2 years ago
59 minutes 43 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 258: Their 12th Favorite Film
Ecclesiastical!  If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Hello world!  
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2 years ago
1 hour 3 minutes 44 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 257: The Cheez Whiz Was Expired
We didn't realize until after we stopped recording that the Cheez Whiz eaten in today's program was two weeks past its sell-by date. I bought it at a Kroger, and like, yeah sell-by dates are kind of dumb sometimes, but like, what? How? If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy pile-up: https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Hello world!
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2 years ago
1 hour 5 minutes 52 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 256: We Have King’s Hawaiian Money
I know the title is supposed to be "Skating for Christ." But that isn't my new favorite phrase ever, so, what can you do. Today's show also features a grim look at airport Starbucks by someone who's connecting flight is definitely impossible. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy pile-up:  https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/
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2 years ago
1 hour 5 minutes 36 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 255: Carol Time.
In today's show we piss, cuss, steal, and win (everybody's doing it). If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Hello world!
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2 years ago
59 minutes 52 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 254: Milk Theft! Milk Theft!
Today's episode is sponsored by the Steak & Milk diet! Eat like Daniel Plainview, die like Daniel Plainview.  If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one awesome pile-up: https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 (It's so big I have to import it to Spotify manually, and I don't) Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Hello world!
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2 years ago
1 hour 14 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 253: Small Quantities of Asbestos
If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ I'm desperate to own an Ovilus 3, if anyone is selling.
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2 years ago
1 hour 5 minutes 22 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 252: A Revolving Door for Women
This one is about the horrors of 8th grade, 7th grade, and Fort Lauderdale. Thank my lucky stars I've only experienced two of them. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/
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2 years ago
1 hour 6 minutes 10 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 251: A Bed/Cracker Situation
On an all new EAC, alliances will be broken, showmances will be shattered, and one contestant's life will change forever. We also talk about the Applebee's in San Francisco. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Boo!
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2 years ago
1 hour 4 minutes 6 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 250: St. Peter Says, Yikes
That face when the highlight reel of your life is cringy AF, am I right? No? Just me?  If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Listen to the other great shows on our network: https://xraypod.com/ I did really hug Tommy Wiseau once. 
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2 years ago
1 hour 2 minutes 5 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 249: Corona Times Fun Grabber
OOOOOOH MAN. AAAAAAAH yiss. Giant sticky hands. Also in today's show, we look at tips for making chalupas, listener Chris kills it, and we give away 50 free trials of MAX. Just MAX. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Listen to the other great shows on our network: https://xraypod.com/ I did really hug Tommy Wiseau once. 
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2 years ago
1 hour 1 minute 24 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 248: Dr. Dre’s Hoptimonium
Did you know hot tub boats are a thing? Yep, that's all I've got. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Listen to the other great shows on our network: https://xraypod.com/ I did really hug Tommy Wiseau once. 
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2 years ago
1 hour 5 minutes 17 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 247: It’s Not Fun to Read
We've got a fantastic listener special for ya' today, with reviews from the Ikea cafeteria and the billigerent, anti-suffrage book nook. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Listen to the other great shows on our network: https://xraypod.com/ I did really hug Tommy Wiseau once.  Cube Steaks with Frog69
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2 years ago
1 hour 33 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 246: Most Controversial Squeezer
Today's episode is *littered* with inaccuracies. To be clear, the Juicy Salif is not poison when you juice on it. The instructions say it tastes bad when you juice on it. Aluminum being bad for you is somewhat debunked.  But at least when we lie, it's about juicers. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Listen to the other great shows on our network: https://xraypod.com/ I did really hug Tommy Wiseau once. 
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2 years ago
1 hour 3 minutes 13 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 245: Y-U-C-C-H-Y
Alternate titles for today's show: "Totally Fucked" Tin Can PullerAppropriately DomesticMold on the CobwebsChickumsUpturned MeatshieldSurrounded by Grease If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Listen to the other great shows on our network: https://xraypod.com/ I did really hug Tommy Wiseau once. 
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2 years ago
1 hour 3 minutes 11 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 244: Dark Yelp Live!
Also in today's episode, we explore a business that sells "urban camping" as a good thing. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Listen to the other great shows on our network: https://xraypod.com/ I did really hug Tommy Wiseau once. 
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2 years ago
1 hour 5 minutes 18 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 243: Foo Foo Woman Food
I don't know what to say anymore. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Listen to the other great shows on our network: https://xraypod.com/ I did really hug Tommy Wiseau once.  Cube Steaks with Frog69
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2 years ago
1 hour 1 minute 9 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 242: What’s Rapini?
In today's show, we study the mythos of a truly obnoxious megastructure. We also look at reviews for a big cross. If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Listen to the other great shows on our network: https://xraypod.com/ I did really hug Tommy Wiseau once. 
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2 years ago
1 hour 2 minutes 46 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
Ep 241: Women Like Boneless Wings
Alternate titles for today's episode include: Tina TrashassMeow MeowEating and PlayI. Have. A. Allergy.Riddled in Allergy SauceCheetah Girls Crashed My PhoneNegation of All Human KindnessIt's Women's History Month (FFS) If you like the show, PLEASE TELL A FRIEND? That's our advertising for the moment.  Our favorite music in one messy (awesome) pile-up: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0uPjDIPt5PuItK7SzTeiUE?si=d7b3827f642341d4 https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/588a3c9d-cf2f-42fc-9663-5448730033b9 Buy our shirts and cups: https://www.designbyhumans.com/shop/CriticEveryone/ Yell at us: foreveracritic@gmail.com Tweet at us: @CriticEveryone Allow conspiracies to fester with us: Facebook Fan Page: https://www.facebook.com/Everyones-a-Critic-2327696304154655/ Listen to the other great shows on our network: https://xraypod.com/ I did really hug Tommy Wiseau once. 
Show more...
2 years ago
59 minutes 47 seconds

Everyone's A Critic
The internet's first curated volume of other people's opinions! Each week, Jess and Jonathan take a deep, dark dive into the web's most popular review platforms, sharing with you the funniest snippets of humanity they can find. Yelpers who can't find the bathroom. AllRecipes chefs who completely change the recipe, then review it anyway. Amazon shoppers and their thoughts on meat by-products. With new themes to explore each episode, Jess and Jonathan hope to give voice to all the desperate internet reviewers shouting endlessly into the void. It's a comedy podcast!