Hello there, perverts and welcome to the return and rebranding of Feral Slut Storytime. In case you’ve forgotten or never were aware, this is the segment of our programming where I regale you, the listener, with tawdry stories of debauchery from my not-too-distant past. Think of it like a fucked up memoir of sorts.
I tell these tales not with malice in my heart or a grudge to settle. The universe and its big dick of karma seem to have done better than I ever could to punish the nameless parties involved. I am pushed to tell my stories by the same urge that caused me to create EAF radio at all-. It’s just another part I thought my listeners would be interested in hearing about. And if there’s one thing true about my existence on this planet it’s that if there’s a story to tell that I find interesting, I’m gonna tell it because I can’t be the only one who feels that way.
I originally started writing this would-be memoir to document what I thought would be a slutty, adventure filled love story for the ages. The more chapters of it I lived, the more it became a horror story that felt like I had to fill the pages of with polite lies and exaggerations to both entertain my audience and keep myself safe.
That’s not to say there isn’t funny, sexy or weird stuff that happens along the way. But it’s definitely a story that takes more than a few dark turns for the worse as it chugs along which I’ve come to learn doesn’t make it any less deserving of being told.
As I said in an earlier edition of my attempts to put this story out into the void of the internet, some of the people that were involved in my life as I lived through it have spent the time since I’ve removed my presence from their lives demonizing me as crazy, an addict, a gold digger and a liar to anyone who would listen because they thought that’s what I was going to do to them. As the old saying goes, don’t tell lies about me and I won’t tell the truth about you and it’s far passed time for me to tell my side of things as honestly as I can, even when it would show me in a better light to not to. So without any further ado, welcome to the first episode of Feral Fuck Storytime.
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Fonda's VoidIntro music by Steve Oxen
