In this episode, Amelia and Lilly are joined by therapist Hilary Rosenberg for the conversation your TikTok algorithm hinted at but never fully explained: attachment styles—and how they quietly (or loudly) shape your dating life in your 20s.

Together, they unpack the four main styles (anxious, avoidant, fearful-avoidant, and secure) and explore how each one shows up in modern relationships. From the anxious-avoidant pull to the ways dating apps poke at our deepest insecurities, they explore how early experiences and emotional blueprints keep playing out in adult love—and what to do about it.

Hilary offers a refreshingly grounded take, including her signature “full-body yes” metaphor to help listeners tune into their nervous systems and navigate dating with more clarity, curiosity, and self-trust.

Therapy-Informed Takeaways:

• Attachment styles are learned early—usually before you knew what dating even was.
• The anxious/avoidant dynamic is common, but not sustainable without growth.
• TikTok might help you name your patterns; therapy helps you shift them.
• Insecure attachment often leads to code-switching or people-pleasing in dating.
• Online dating tends to magnify existing attachment triggers.
• Regulating your nervous system (not your hinge profile) is the real game-changer.
• Safe relationships support healing—but they might feel unfamiliar at first.

Related Episodes:

• Modern Love & Materialism: A Deep Dive into Celine Song’s Materialists
• Breadcrumbing, Benching, and Other Bullsh*t: Modern dating behaviors that mess with your head

Dating In Your 20s Anonymous Corner

We'd love to hear from you! Check out the anonymous DIY20s Form. It's a safe, judgment-free space to share what’s going on in your love life.

Connect:

Lilly Wehman: Millennium | LinkedIn
Amelia Abernathy: Millennium | Linkedin
Hilary Rosenberg: Millennium | LinkedIn

This podcast is powered by Millennium Counseling Center in Chicago, IL. To learn more visit: millenniumhope.com