This was meant to be a Champions League Podcast... yet we still somehow ended up talking about Manchester United. 

We discuss the Premier League title and the Scudetto, both of which came as massive surprises this year. We talk about the top 4 race where Josh Sargent decided to do the chivalrous thing and let Spurs win to clinch. We also explore relegation where Mike Jackson needs to have a long hard look at the Man in the Mirror as Burnley goes down under his management.

Also Mbappe

Everton have bottled their only chance at a trophy and no one wants to celebrate De Gea. Also I never want to talk about Mbappe again

Kiran says no one cares about the quadruple and Liverpool is not impressive. I remember nothing else from this episode.

TBH I don't remember what happens in this episode except Everton continues to suck relentlessly and Kiran conveniently isn't here to defend his club or to make wrong predictions again

The boys are finally back after a lengthy hiatus. Kiran hosts Hunter and Pranav as Chris is too embarrassed to show his face (or his voice?) after United lose to Everton and Atletico finally say SIUUU later to Ronaldo and co... Before Manchester's better halves dispatched them following the War at the Wanda. HiP and Keeper discuss Chelsea's roller coaster few weeks as Hunter laments not making it to a final for the first time ever under Tuchel. Bayern and Barca are out of Europe following masterclasses from very mediocre teams in each others' leagues. City vs Liverpool happened **cue Pep meme** TWIIICEEE this in one week as the first match ensures that fans of both teams remain chronically hypertensive and the second ensures that Gregg Berhalter is going to go with Zach Steffen as his starting keeper for the foreseeable future (the joke here is that Gregggggg just does whatever he wants and his decisions make absolutely no sense like 60% of the time). Bonus: Pranav uses 80% of his allotted recap time to salivate over meeting the mastermind behind Liverpool's throw-in dominance: Thomas Gronnemark, the only man any of have ever met that has experienced a Klopp hug. Everton fans get a glimmer of hope as they beat United in a match in which they were clear overcats. The Toffees get an additional boost as relegation rivals, Burnley, say 4-4-2dle-doo to iconic manager, Sean Dyche. Ligue 1 happened also. As did Bundesliga. HiP and Keeper then discuss which is the more polite race: top 4 Prem or Serie A title race with neither coming out a clear winner (much like the races themselves). We finally look ahead to next week's spicy fixtures before Hunter breaks down the Moldovan League and Kiran just straight up breaks down.

Kiran returns after conveniently avoiding the Everton Relegation Pod Special, only to find himself hosting the sequel as Chris, Hunter, and Pranav help him try to see the positives, like Everton maybe winning a trophy next season. I won't torture Kiran any longer in this description since he already gets tortured enough by us on this pod...and by Everton on the field. We look at the Champions League first as Big Body Benz ('member we thought he was dusted), smashes 3 past PSGeez I can't believe that happened again. After light discussion of the other UCL ties and a heavy discussion on PSG's future, we move onto the prem where we planned on talking about a lot of stuff but spent all the allotted time focused on whether Ronaldo was worth bringing in to United following a winning hattrick despite Maguire's best efforts. Arsenal stay in form, placing a firm claim to their rightful spot in 4th place, proving nature is, indeed, healing. City dropped points to Crystal Palace as KDB is surrounded by 9 Werners and an Ederson, opening the door ever more slightly for the all new Liver(more depth than a kiddie)poo. Milan remain on top of Serie A due to the support of their passionate (and apparently very pretentious) support. Madrid are running away with La Liga, Bayern blah blah blah, and PSG blah blah. End-of-episode predictions run for longer than Modric did against PSG before we wrap up with Hunter's new State of the Club segment.

TBH I don't remember what happens in this episode except Everton sucks and Kiran isn't here to defend his club or to make wrong predictions.

Kiran hosts as we welcome guest Saswot Risal, a Liverpool supporter who is just as unbearable as the rest of em. We begin with a discussion about Russia's imposed war on Ukraine and what that means for the footballing world from Daddy Abramovich's Chelsea ownership to Infantino's pinky swear friendship bracelet from Putin. Afterwards, we mostly spend an insignificant amount of time on pretty much everything except for talking (or, in Pranav and Saswot's case, reminiscing) about the Carabao Cup Final while Kiran makes dinner.

Kiran hosts today and finally introduces himself as such. Matt Kaz, Gooner and creator of the legendary CHiP the Keeper intro fills in for a strangely absent Chris despite this being the first week United did something by deleeding Bielsa's men. And since Chris isn't here, we don't talk about them at all for the first time in pod history and instead spend like 35 perfectly good minutes blathering on about Arsenal and whether they suck a lot or just a little... or maybe don't suck at all?? Speaking of suck a lot or a little or not at all, not even Kaz can deny Harry Kane's masterclass against the Bald Fraud's Pityzens to orchestrate the immaculate conception of a title race which, until now, only existed in Pranav's wet dreams. And of course, we cannot move on from the Premier League without addressing an all time PREMIER LEAGUE RECORD: 7 touches in an entire match by the world's most expensive lawn gnome, Lakaka. Atleti and Barca are put under a microscope as we examine their even table standing before focusing in on Aubameyang doing his best competent striker impression and dropping a hatty on Valencia. The Serie A title race seems to be ending up rather similarly to the Prem's top 4 race as all 3 teams in contention make seemingly conscious decisions not to win. We pretend to care about Serie A before pretty much completely skipping over the Bundesliga and moving on to Champions League where Kiran has to face his weekly allotted time as the court jester for his predictions. The boys then give their predictions for the weeks upcoming UCL and Prem fixtures as Pranav and Hunter are both convinced they'll lose the Mickey Mouse Cup final to make themselves feel better for actually losing it.

Notably absent from the pod: Chris Wood meowing at Kurt Zouma for the duration of that match

*Apologies for audio issues*