Absurd, Moronic, & Downright Ridiculous

• Minnesota Movie Theater Manager Sold Popcorn With Cocaine Hidden Inside At Concession Stand
• Ohio Politician Video Calls Into Debate On New Driving Law While Driving
• Man Allegedly Swings Colostomy Bag At Cops At Kid Rock's Bar In Nashville

National Sports

• Kentucky Derby Winner Medina Spirit Fails Post Race Drug Test; Bob Baffert Banned
• Jacksonville Jaguars To Sign Tim Tebow To 1-Year Deal To Play Tight End
• Albert Pujols Final Hours With The Angels Turned Ugly

New England Sports

• Boston Bruins
• Boston Celtics
• Boston Red Sox
• New England Patriots