What does parenting do to us? Why do we do it? Why is there such a huge gap between what we think parenting will be and what it is? What are the jobs of Mums and Dads now: What’s a dad when he’s no longer just a provider, what’s a mum when she quite often is? Why, when we think having children will bring us together, does it so often push us apart? How do I know what to teach and model for my children when I don’t know what the world is going to look like in five years time? Why did my parents seem to have so much conviction about these things and I have absolutely none?
Well, I don’t know but luckily there are some really clever people all over the world who are thinking about these things and they’ve agreed to talk to me. So maybe we won’t be able to answer all these questions every week but maybe if we listen to their ideas we can gain some insight and some wisdom and maybe most importantly some perspective and find out what it takes to be a happier parent.
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What does parenting do to us? Why do we do it? Why is there such a huge gap between what we think parenting will be and what it is? What are the jobs of Mums and Dads now: What’s a dad when he’s no longer just a provider, what’s a mum when she quite often is? Why, when we think having children will bring us together, does it so often push us apart? How do I know what to teach and model for my children when I don’t know what the world is going to look like in five years time? Why did my parents seem to have so much conviction about these things and I have absolutely none?
Well, I don’t know but luckily there are some really clever people all over the world who are thinking about these things and they’ve agreed to talk to me. So maybe we won’t be able to answer all these questions every week but maybe if we listen to their ideas we can gain some insight and some wisdom and maybe most importantly some perspective and find out what it takes to be a happier parent.
Find me on Instagram and TikTok @beahappierparent and Youtube @alexindadland
Summary
This conversation delves into the complexities of parenting, particularly focusing on the gender dynamics that contribute to burnout among mothers. It highlights the need for shared responsibilities in domestic work, the impact of societal expectations, and the importance of emotional labor. The discussion also addresses the challenges of weaponized incompetence and the necessity for men to actively participate in parenting and household duties. Furthermore, it emphasizes the gaps in women's health research and the ongoing struggle for equality in both domestic and professional spheres.
Chapters
00:00 Introduction to Bridging the Gap05:02 Understanding Gender Equity and Unpaid Labor06:29 The Role of Men in Gender Conversations08:45 Common Struggles in Domestic Dynamics11:38 Weaponized Incompetence and Emotional Manipulation14:27 Navigating Patriarchy and Its Impact on Relationships17:09 The Importance of Emotional Availability19:38 Creating Systems for Domestic Equity22:20 Negotiating Household Standards24:50 Personal Stories and Reflections on Domestic Roles31:18 Breaking Generational Patterns33:46 Shared Responsibilities in Relationships35:15 The Invisible Mental Load40:28 Gaps in Medical Research44:22 Workplace Inequities46:22 Empowering Future Generations49:45 Raising the Bar for Parenting54:21 Encouraging Initiative in Dads
Takeaways
Many women are experiencing burnout due to societal pressures.Parenting issues are often systemic rather than individual.Men need to take accountability in parenting roles.Weaponized incompetence complicates domestic responsibilities.Emotional labor is often overlooked in discussions about parenting.Patriarchy affects both men and women negatively.Societal change is necessary for true equity in parenting.Building deeper connections with children requires shared responsibilities.Practical systems can help manage domestic duties effectively.Recognition of each other's efforts is crucial for a balanced partnership.
Keywords
parenting, gender dynamics, burnout, emotional labor, domestic responsibilities, patriarchy, societal change, family equity, recognition, health research
Sound Bites
"So many women are getting so burnt out""Weaponized incompetence is a real issue""We need to raise the bar for dads"
Be a Happier Parent
What does parenting do to us? Why do we do it? Why is there such a huge gap between what we think parenting will be and what it is? What are the jobs of Mums and Dads now: What’s a dad when he’s no longer just a provider, what’s a mum when she quite often is? Why, when we think having children will bring us together, does it so often push us apart? How do I know what to teach and model for my children when I don’t know what the world is going to look like in five years time? Why did my parents seem to have so much conviction about these things and I have absolutely none?
Well, I don’t know but luckily there are some really clever people all over the world who are thinking about these things and they’ve agreed to talk to me. So maybe we won’t be able to answer all these questions every week but maybe if we listen to their ideas we can gain some insight and some wisdom and maybe most importantly some perspective and find out what it takes to be a happier parent.
