Script:

Episode 26: How to deal with gossips

A gossip is a rumor or a report of somebody, usually something bad. The conversation usually starts with, "Oh my God, did you hear...?" Gossips happen at work and at social gatherings.

Why do people gossip? People gossip for a variety of reasons, which can be both positive and negative. On the positive side, gossiping can help people build and maintain social connections by sharing information and stories about others. It can also provide a way for people to bond over shared experiences or even serve as a form of entertainment.

However, gossiping can also be used as a means of social control. People may spread rumors or negative information about others to damage their reputation, or it can serve as a way to make people feel superior by having exclusive information into other people's lives. If you are uncomfortable about gossiping, how do you politely ask somebody to stop talking badly about somebody else?

1. Change the topic. When somebody says to you, "Did you hear what she did yesterday?" You know the next thing that she says will be some kind of gossip or rumor. If you don't want to participate in a gossip or rumor, you can say, "no", and then immediately follow by saying something totally different, such as,

"Have you started watching that new TV show?", or "how are your kids?", or "how's the new project going?"

You make it clear you are not interested in the gossip, and want to move on to another topic. If that doesn't work, and the person is persistent in gossiping, then you can try the following strategy.

2. Shut it down. Simply be honest. Tell the person that you are not comfortable talking about somebody else when they are not here. You can even say,

"I am not really into gossip." You can ask to change the topic by saying, "Do you mind if we talk about something else?" or "Do you mind if you change the subject?"

It is good to be honest.

Thank you for listening.