Being adopted is like being a squared peg trying to fit into a round hole. You just don't fit so after a while you stop trying adoption is a trauma that happens to a child. The child is torn from a mother, placed in the arms of strangers and is left with questions, doubts, fears, and anxiety with no way to verbalize, Express, mourn, or contextualize those feelings. It has been said that adoption is more like a marriage than a birth: two ( or more ) Individuals, each with their own unique mix of needs, patterns and genetic history, coming together with love, hope, , commitment for a joint future you become a family not because you share the same genes but because you share love for each other. Finding my birth family was the single most important moment of my entire life, it was ( As ) if I'd been holding my breath my entire life and for the first time I could let it out. Being adopted means you didn't have any say and everyone expects you to be someone you are not you never really lived until you have done something for someone who can never repay you. Never assume that because a child was adopted that their life is as wonderful as adoption is painted out to be. Many adoptees are grieving the loss of their mother and family. Those feelings don't always go away because a child was adopted. Being a parent wasn't just about bearing a child it was about bearing witness its life a child born to another woman calls me mommy. The magnitude of that tragedy and the depth of that privilege are not lost on me tears are words too painful for a broken heart to speak