Recovery for me meant a never-ending self-improvement project and a continuous focus on my problems. So while my relationship with alcohol was destroying my life, the idea of recovery simply wasn't attractive enough to me. Then one day I asked myself the question. How would my life need to be for me to not want to use alcohol? The thing that initially attracted me to alcohol provided some vital clues. I realized that I wanted to be comfortable in my own skin, comfortable around other people, and for the world to appear full of wonder as it sometimes did when I first started drinking alcohol. I then knew that if I could get these things a better way, I wouldn't need alcohol anymore.