I’d been told to listen to these adults and do what they said, and they had said I was “bad,” and I believed them. Since I thought I was “bad,” I felt I deserved all the punishment (abuse) I received.
This episode is also available as a blog post: https://neurodivergentrebel.com/2023/04/28/abused-at-school-why-autistic-kids-may-not-speak-up-when-theyve-been-harmed-by-a-teacher/